Do You Need to Forgive Your Father?

Article by Afi Pittman

I know many of us have fond memories of our father. But this Father’s Day, this article is dedicated to single women who had poor relationships with their father. Whether he was absentee, abusive, or just not an example of what a girl should hope for in a future husband, there is an opportunity for God to expand you. If your dad matches the descriptions I just stated, ask yourself “Do I need to forgive my father?”

I once heard Tyler Perry say that forgiveness is not for them, it’s for you. Now, God calls us to forgive as part of our lifestyle as Christians. But I still love his revelation. Because often times we equate forgiving someone to condoning they did to us, letting them off, or being weak. But the truth is that holding grudges – even at the most heinous offense – only continues to hurt us. Even if your dad hurt you to your core, if you haven’t forgiven him I’m sure he’s most likely moved on with his life. Even though you are still hurting.

So as you reflect on whatever your relationship was with your father, take the time to consider forgiving him. Because until you do, you run the risk of staying in your own way in dating and relationships with new men. Remember, it’s not for your dad. First, it’s for God. Second, it’s for you. God wants you to release your dad to Him, and to release your hurts to Him. He wants to heal you so that he can pour that new wine (relationship, marriage) you keep asking Him for.

If you find yourself having a hard time forgiving because your father did something horrible to you, I want you to do two things:

1) Pray: Pray to God about the hurt, the unhealed wounds, you fears, your anger. Pray about all of it. Keep on praying every day until you say all you need to say to God about the matter.

2) Trust God: How? Decide that God will heal you. Be like the woman with the issue of blood who pressed her way into the crowd to get her healing. Press into God by first believing that He can and will heal you. Then, trust that He will show you how to heal. He will show you the resources and people He’s placed in your life to help you recover.

Until the next time, believe that God want to hear what you have to say and that you can trust Him.

Afi Pittman is an author and radio show host. She is also active duty Navy and has traveled the world and lived abroad. Her company, Author of Faith Enterprises helps today’s single Christian woman to “live right, love life and find Mr. Right”. Contact Afi Pittman at:  http://www.authorofmyfaith.com/home