Dating with Kids
For those claiming that there are rigid norms attached to dating, the reality surely provides a lot of surprises. There should be nothing staying between two people which find each other attractive. Passing a certain age and even having kids is no excuse for muting your emotional life. Dating with kids, although having a bit of a taboo sense attached to it is perfectly normal and even encouraged. But knowing how to do things the proper way can save you from a lot of criticism, fueled by both inner and outer voices.
Being a mother or a father has a lot to do with a decreased self-esteem, especially if you get down and compare yourself with younger members of the dating pool. Having children surely moves the accent from taking care of your own-self to taking care of others, so you could start by digging up those old habits. Putting up make-up and wearing clothes which complement your physique are not forbidden for a mother who is eager to meet new potential life partners. If you are a man, consider getting back in shape and pay more attention to the way you dress and groom.
Being a recently divorced parent should never blow your confidence in finding the right person for you. Nevertheless, you should know how to play your cards right. Having kids should by no means be hidden, as it can act to boost your chances. Many individuals actually enjoy the idea of dating someone with children, someone which proves from the start the fact that he/she is willing to go all the way towards full commitment in a relationship.
Kids should never be seen as an obstacle, as something pulling you away from the person you really are. According to their age, children can understand the role of the new person entering your life. Don’t try to present it from the start as a candidate for replacing their mother/father as chances are the idea will never appeal. Having small children can take away the burden of providing arguments. At the opposite spectrum, dating while having teenagers in your family can create quite some interesting conversation. Don’t reject the criticism of your own children and come up with the proper arguments to defend your life decisions.
Making room for dating inside a tight agenda is a real skill. Happiness in life is almost always about being able to balance work and family, and dating with kids splits the second side in two. Balancing between the responsibility for your children and the freedom of dating puts you on a thin wire. Back in the days when you were young, things were easy, but heading again in the game can leave you drained of resources. Dating should never become for you a burden and allowing yourself some breathing moments can do a lot of good in this direction.
You should face the fact that there is no guidebook for dating as a parent. Following your instincts and receiving everything with a small dose of skepticism can keep you on the safe side. Nevertheless, being too cautious and picky can make you enjoy less the act of dating. Setting yourself free from inhibitions might be another ground to conquer while you have taken parenthood as a full-time job. Reminding yourself that age doesn’t tie your hands at your back and that being a late bloomer is normal for some people, is crucial for morale.
Yes, morale and the right mental approach are tools you should never leave at home while venturing to date as a parent. There is an entire stigma which people create around dealing with single parents. They are often put in a bad light by society, which is quick in suspecting that there is something wrong with the person unable to hold on to a relationship, especially when kids are involved. Self-confidence needs constant boost if criticism is coming your way from multiple directions. Although you don’t need to justify yourself to others, you need to be in peace with yourself. Seeking a relationship just too quiet down voices will get you almost nowhere. Dating someone younger is no longer as shocking as it once was, and you should never base your filters on that.