The Real Truth about “I DO!”

Article by Dr. Darcova Triplett

The scene was set at Greater New Hope Baptist Church in Atlanta, Georgia. The sanctuary was filled to capacity with our family and friends present to witness this sentimental ceremony. Crimson, cream and black draped our attendants as cali lilies and tulle accentuated the atmosphere. Rev. Jackson asked, “Darcova, do you take Todd as your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, from February 12, 2000, forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?” I responded with, “I DO!” Although I stood gazing in Todd’s eyes dreaming of our happily ever after, our years of becoming one have afforded me the opportunity to realize that Todd is merely the vessel and my “I DO” is, essentially, to GOD. I’ve come to realize that through all of the tradition of the vows and the sentiments of the verbiage, the real essence of the moment is our promise to GOD confirming…

• I DO trust You.
• I DO believe that You know exactly what You are doing.
• I DO surrender my will for Your will.
• I DO understand that You have my best interest at heart.
• I DO forgive a limitless amount of times.
• I DO forget everything that attempts to set me back and throw it into the Sea of Forgetfulness.
• I DO recognize that it is Your desire for me to be prosperous in every area of my life.

It is my belief that when a husband finds his rib and the two are reunited in Holy Matrimony, the union was pre-ordained with a purpose- that purpose being (1) for you, individually, to become the person God needs you to be in order to bear witness to others and (2) for you, together, to be an example for the Kingdom. All too often, challenges, distractions and life itself draw couples away from their true purpose. It appears that careers, children, family, bills, illnesses, expectations, motivation and aspirations weigh heavy on our marriages and the mirage that ‘every reason is a good reason to part ways’ looks appealing. I encourage you today to preserve your commitment to God. Remember that God knew these moments would come and when we trust in Him, we realize that they are simply set-ups for our come-ups. I’m jumping up and down waving my hand acknowledging the fact that some days in the life of a married person are dazzling with the glitz, glam and glitter… while others appear to be bland and unbearable. BUT, I also nod my head ferociously confirming that as situations arise, continuously putting the focus back on God (in the good and the bad) places everything in perspective.

Here’s the deal… The next time your spouse does the unthinkable and you’re ready to call it quits, instead, choose to remember your commitment to God and say, “God, I DO trust that even in this situation, you are still in control. The next time you’re overwhelmed and frustrated with the responsibilities of being in a committed relationship, instead, choose to understand that this is a committed relationship to God and proclaim, “God, I DO believe that your way is better than my way.”

Whenever you are tempted to step over there on that other side because the grass looks greener, the sun seems brighter and it appears that every day is a happy-go-lucky day, instead, choose to refocus and recommit with the acknowledgement that “God, I DO recognize that you have me HERE for a purpose.” When he won’t communicate and she won’t act right, refuse to engage in another argument. Resist the urge to set them straight. Sometimes you even have to keep your feelings to yourself. Instead, choose to take it to God and shout I DO know that you have my best interest at heart… so God, YOU GOTTA DO SOMETHING! And it is when we continuously come back to Him for EVERYTHING that He hears us and He appropriately responds EVERYTIME.

As we become one, complement each other and mature in our marriages according to God’s plan, the blessings overtake us. The stretch may feel a little uncomfortable but once you make it through you become that living testimony, time and time again, that God Blesses Marriages. Believe That… I DO!!!

Contact Dr. Darcova Triplett at: www.facebook.com/StrutTheMagazine